Tête-à-tête, in my heart!

"How do you manage, sleeping just 4-5 hours everyday? In fact how are you even alive?", she asked me in disbelief, oblivious of the fact that, people sleep in need to slacken their mind and body, and I make up for it by being in love with her.

"Loving you, is what I need more than the norm 8 hours of sleep", I told.

"You are such a bollywood buff, fully-filmi!!", she chuckled.

She was concealing something beneath her radiant smiling face. Somewhere down in her mind, even she knew, what I said was partly true. She realized I loved her like mad. But she dint want to concede it, for, she had a notion, she could not handle so much of it and she could not match up to it.

She told me someday, she cannot love me back as much as I do, completely oblivious of the fact, that, even half of it could make my life more beautiful.

"A feeling 'You are around' is enough for me" I said.
I knew, in my mind, I was hiding a thing when I said that. I did need her to love me immensely. But knowing that she cannot, for reasons known best to her, forced me to lie to her.

She smiled and looked into my eyes, as if telling me, I know you are lying, you idiot!. 

Few seconds later, she seized my hands and said, "I am always around you! Am I not?", and leaned her head over my shoulders, with the wind pushing her hair into my eyes", completely oblivious of the fact that, I want to love her more every time she did that.

"You smell so right", I thought and said "Your hair is hurting my eyes".

"And I thought you find them sexy!" she said, as if she could read my mind, and came closer to me, with my nose breathing hers, completely oblivious of the fact that, it would be impossible for me not to think of kissing her.

I had my eyes closed, to not let go of the sweetest moment of my life, and there she was, now standing in front of me, patting my head, as if waking me up.

"You were about to kiss me, you idiot!", she said with a mischievous smile.

"Yeah I want to kiss you, now and forever!", I thought. I got up and put my arms around her.

"Was I? I din't realize, I fell asleep for a minute darling.", I said, almost trying to tease her. But she was probably "as mad as I was"  that day.

"Oh really! I thought you were in a mood to love me", she said, completely oblivious of the fact that, I am always loving her, in my mind.

"I don't need to have a mood to love you babe, I love you unconditionally, mood no bar, time no bar, place no bar!", I smiled.

"You filmi buff, say you love me", she hugged me tight, put a peck on my cheek, and hid her face in to my chest.

"I love you, I love you and I love you like mad" I yelled in my mind. 

"I already said that shonaa", I responded.

"Say it again for me", her breath was now echoing in my chest, as if she wanted to listen to what my heart beats said, completely oblivious of the fact that, it beat for her.

"What do you think 'my heart beats' are telling you?" I asked her as if it was just obvious.

"Only I can hear 'your heart beats' idiot, and so only I know all that they want to say. But I want this air around us to know that you love me. So, say it for me once more".

"Ahaa...! who is being fully-filmi now?", I asked with a smile, this time completely oblivious of the fact that she really meant to hear that from me, for reasons again best known to her.

"Thuddd..." she hit me hard with fake anger and a genuine smile.

"Ok baby, I love you!", I screamed, as loud as I could.
The valley, we were sitting next to, did the rest, by reverberating my words twice.

"Now tell me you love me too...".

"You know it, I don't!" she smiled shyly and sealed my lips with hers.

"You say it best, when you say nothing at all...", my ears buzzed.
(No, there was no music in the background. There was no filmy breeze blowing around us. There were no clouds and no chances of rain.) 

What we had were, two passionate hearts, and a moment to let our love thrive upon!

Tryst with Gokarna...!

What do you do when you are surrounded with people who pounce on every chance to travel? You just decide on a place, pack your bags and get your bums on the wheels.
With the year 2010 coming to an end and everyone getting into a holiday mood, we set ourselves up for a trip to Gokarna.

The best part about such trips is the time that precedes it, when everyone is planning on the matters such as how to travel, where to stay and what all activities to do. Six different persons and you have six different opinions. We wanted to drive all the way to Gokarna on a bike and a car. We were just a little sceptical about the chances of rain. But then we kept our fears aside and boiled down to the option of driving down.
The car i10 had already proved a point by travelling down to Hyderabad covering 1200 kms over 2 days, and the avenger was raring to prove its mettle after a successful ride to Yercaud (200 kms from Bangalore).

We planned to leave Bangalore by 6 PM. One of us lost the house key with the bags inside the house, and Dhoom-pichak-dhoom fame Mr. Anurag almost lost his bike key at the famous ginger tea shop in BTM, and that all marked the beginning of our trip, and lead us to actually leave by 7.30 PM. I set myself on the car driver seat and Manish Y was the co-pilot and with Amit playing the role of DJ to perfection yet again, clubbed with the jokes cracked by Manish P, aka Santa Lallllaa, the man for all seasons, we were all set for a rocking drive. Anurag was avenging, with Abhijeet being the pillion rider, and I tell you the fun they were having riding the bike was no lesser than the guys in the car.

We cruised via NICE road to hit the Tumkur road, and halted at Kamath for dinner. We crossed Tumkur, 70 KMs from Bangalore by 21.45, and took a diversion towards Shimoga on NH-206. This road definitely needs a special mention here. NH-206, a "fame" (read "Shame") in the name of National Highway. Even the roads in my village would be better than this. But than probably that was among the highlights of this trip.

When the clock read 23:50, we were in the middle of a town on the way and we halted for getting the fuel refilled. After all, Kamath dint serve the food for i10 and avenger. With clock hitting 00:00, it was the beginning of Christmas day (2010) and  it was time for Abhijeet to get into maddening mood. We wished each other with our santa caps on and Abhijeet clicked some pictures in a way only best known to him. We started off again from there after people shuffling the seats. M&M got onto the bike and Anurg-Abhijeet got into the car.

We kept driving the whole night like mad, checking the routes on the google-map every now and then. It was a savior. There were some beautiful, scary, broken roads on the way. We took t-breaks at regular intervals and finally I handed over the car to Anurag at 4.30 AM when I could not keep my eyes open even after splashing cold water every 5 mins. It was in the middle of the ghat section. Anurag as if just waiting to get a chance, drove the car like it was NH7 to hyd. Every t-break we stopped for (once per hour), the bike pillion riders had a story to tell, on how they conquered their fear as Manish Yadav kept avenging madly (and blindly) on the "beautiful roads"!

We entered Gokarna with the very first sun ray hitting the backwaters on the way. The scenes there were amazing. The fatigue that had creep ed in after a drive of 11 hours just went off in a blink. It was as if sun was waiting for us to enter the roads of Gokarna. We clicked a few pics with the rising sun on the backwaters shores and decided to head on to the beach first. We bypassed our hotel (Abhijeet booked in advance) to reach the beach. The last 3-4 kms to the beach is a hill road and we got down at every point we could get a glimpse of the beach. It was as if, reaching the beach, was our life's only motive. But then, for a moment it was. It was the only aim of our lives after a maddening drive of 11 hours. I almost ran i10 over Abhijeet's right leg during this last 10 mins of drive.

Nevertheless, we had breakfast and tea at one of the shacks on the beach. We had some fun before wisely deciding to go and check into the hotel. It was a dormitory room - perfect for the bachelors. It was time to crash down in the bed as per the need of the hour.

People started getting up late in the afternoon one after the other. I was the last one to open my eyes. With one eye open, I saw Manish Y meditating, Manish P and Abhijeet hogging on to the pakodas they had ordered, Anurag roaming aroung in the room with the towel around his shoulders and Amit already searching for better routes to go back to Bangalore the next day.

We started getting ready with everyone sighing for a body massage. We made a queue with everyone massaging the person next to him and to be fair in the end, the person first in the queue returned the favors to person last in the queue. Half pants/3/4ths, t-shirts, chappals, goggles and hats. We were all set to have a tryst with Gokarna beach. The famous OM beach (famous for its shape as 'Om', a holy hindi word).

We enjoyed some water sports and played cricket before taking a dip into the "holy" water of Om beach. And by the time sun started closing down its office, we took our chances to pose in groups and pictures were clicked in the beautiful sunset on the beach. We then had some light snacks before getting back to our room.

We then got ready for another innings on the beach. We took one of the hotel bed sheets along with us to sit on the beach all night long. It was almost a full moon that day. We sat nicely right in the middle of the Om beach all the night. Singing every song from our database and having our dinner side by side. Some foreigners deserve a special mention here, who came down to us with a song request. "Munni Badnaam hui...". No wonder Indian music is going global. ;);)

It was time to head back and get some sleep before a long journey back home the next morning. The next morning we did leave, but not before taking a speed boat ride to another beach. It was as beautiful as the OM beach, only lesser crowded. Anurag took the liberty of getting into the sea once again, thanks to the restaurant, it took like ages for them to serve us. They were more interested in what the foreigner breed ordered. Of course 1 dollar is heavier than 1 rupee.

We started our journey back from Gokarna to Bangalore. We were not done with the place but we had to. I realized that I had caught fever, and that was not a good sign as I was supposed to drive back the car. Probably Gokarna did not want us to leave. Nevertheless, I took a medicine and rested for sometime before finally leaving after feeling a lot better. Amit was ready with his maps. We took a different route while returning back, hoping to catch a better road. He did his homework pretty well. But then that's the best you can do with Indian roads. The roads were definitely better, but then the best part of the journey was yet to come.

After driving 50 kms into some jungle road after crossing a town, we saw the road was broken. They were constructing a bridge over a small water body. Someone there told us to follow a tractor which was taking a diversion into the jungle. It was a driving test for me and a test for i10 to show its mettle. We both came up with flying covers though. And only the people who were there in the trip can understand the kind of unplanned adventure we went through. Once we crossed this 200 metres part, it was just a matter of few more hours before we reached back to Bangalore at 2.30 PM. All safe and sound. Hats off guys who rode avenger. People around me still have their mouth wide open when I tell them about it.

A journey, probably the best of them all, came to an end, only to give us a topic of conversation whenever we get together. Everyone wants to repeat this one trip, without realizing that probably awesome journeys are rare to come by. We all were lucky to be a part of this trip. I personally assumed it as my bachelor's party trip later when we could not plan anything just before I got married. Many of us went to the same place again, and did have fun, but probably not enough to match the kinda trip we had.
I might be going over board when I say this, but we probably would be telling about this trip to our kids 25 years from now, and I am sure they would like to repeat the same fate for themselves.

I want you to know it!

A kid asked me, how big is this sky? And I could not define it. "Verrrryyy Bigg..." I told her and she kept asking "How Big...!" and all I could do was stretch my arms as much I could and still could not convince her.
You cannot define a few things around you. You cannot measure it. You just know its there, in plenty.

You know where I am taking you with this. Isn't it? Yeah, like the sky, I cannot define the luvv I hold inside, for u. And yet, I want to convey it. I know I cannot show you how much it is, I know I cannot put a number to it, but yet, I want to show it. I want you to know it.

I know these words will fall short. I know this life will not be enough. In fact, I know even life more than one will fall short. I know, but I want you to know it.

There has to be something, I am yet to come across, that could express exactly how I feel about you. There has to be something out there, at a place not known to me, which might be noting down every time I think of you. And I am sure, it must be tired of noting that down every second. Because that's how much I think of you. I know it, and I want you to know it.

When we love someone, we probably find a place to fit in the person in everything we do, in everything we see, in everything we touch. I do that. I make you the reason of my living. I walk with you in every step I walk. I breathe you in every breath of mine. My mind knows its thinking about you, but I want you to know it.

There must be thousand ways I might have tried showing my luvv to you already and yet, i want to find thousand more ways of doing it. I do not want a pause, I do not want to stop, all I want is to love you. The love inside me loves someone madly, and that someone is you. I convey this to you today, the way I probably did many times before, because I want you to know it.

There is a connection, a strong one at that. There has to be one, to explain why I miss you when you are not around, but still my soul does not feel your absence. It probably meets yours somewhere. This keeps my heart beating. My heart knows it might have stopped otherwise, but I want you to know it.

Now that you know it, I want to know you love me too. Because that's all I want from you. Nothing more n nothing less. I probably will not be able to handle if its "more" and I will not settle for anything "less".
And if you agree to love me, do not take the effort of thinking and writing, the way I chose to.
Three words, a hug and a kiss, everyday, is all it will take for me to know, that you do.